Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Things can change in a moment...

I know it's taken six days to get this out...but I am sure you will be understanding...right??

It was last Thursday, the 18th of March.  I had my 36 week appt.  I was feeling so uncomfortable...just swollen, and just felt so OFF!!  Of course, I am pregnant, so what could I expect?  Anyway, the doctor asked me how I was feeling, and out of nowhere, I start crying and tell her how painful the last week has been.  She reassured me that I only had a few short weeks left, and that I wouldn't be pregnant "forever", and then thought that she should check me for dialation to see what kind of progress we had made. 

skip forward about 10 minutes...I HAD made progress.  She could feel the baby's head, and I was more dialated than the week before.  SIGH...maybe the end WAS in sight.  She then got the doppler to measure the baby's heartbeat.  As she put it on my stomach, I wasn't sure at first what we were hearing.  It was SO FAST.  That couldn't be the baby's heartbeat...could it??  I looked up at the doctor, and saw the concerned look on her face.  She just kept listening.

"I don't like that...I don't like that at all...I am gonna send you over to the hospital to have you monitored."

I then asked her if I should be concerned, and she said it was pretty concerning...and I asked..."concerning like I should call my husband concerned?"

She then said that I would probably want to call him, but that she didn't think that I would be delivered today.  She wanted me to be monitored, and then possibly get medication to the baby to slow her heart rate down.

I texted Brian who was in school and said..."Going to the hospital!!! Call me!!"

I then took the LONGEST ROUTE imaginabe to the hospital, got to L & D, and checked in.  Before I knew it there was a high risk OB doctor and a cardiologist discussing a c-section.  The baby's heart rate was reaching the 280's.  On the ultrasound that they brought into the room, you could see that her heart wasn't really beating, it was more like "quivering."  They decided that at 36 weeks along, the best and safest route for her would be to deliver her so that they could treat her heart directly, instead of trying to give me medicine, and then have it go to the placenta, and then finally to the baby, which could take a whole day. 

We didn't have a day.

Once the decision was made, I was rushed back to the OR.  Brian LUCKILY got my text, and made it to the hospital in time to be briefed and get scrubs to go back for the delivery.

My doctor's appt was at 2:40, and Romy Lin was born by 4:20...!!  She was 5lbs 14 oz, and 18inches long.

It was all so surreal.  I was scared for sure...but I think my biggest feeling was numbness.  I was in total shock!!  So many questions going through my mind...and so many fears. 

They took her to the NICU and Brian went with her.  He came back with a report that they had to treat her twice for her rapid heart rate, but that they were able to stabalize it.  She was in need of oxygen though, so they kept her in NICU to get the extra help.  I got to go see her once I was stable.  They wheeled me in, and she was in a bed that had a dome over her face that was just giving her some extra oxygen.  I layed there and held her which point her saturation levels dropped to 38%.  They immediately wheeled me out so that they could stabalize her once again.  They ended up intibating her for the night. 

(in the dome)


The next day she was doing much better, so they took her off the ventilator.  I got to go down and see her in a wheelchair, and they even let me hold her.  It wasn't 5 minutes, and she was crashing again!!  This time it was her heart rate soaring into the 250's.  It was so scary!!  We sat back as doctors rushed around getting her the meds she needed.  When they give her the heart medication, Adenosine, it is almost as if they are using paddles.  It stops her heart temporarily, her whole little body shudders, and then it resumes beating.  It would resume at the proper rate...and then go balistic again.  They did this three times before I couldn't stand it and asked to be taken out.  I requested that the NICU call me when she was stabalized again.  Luckily I didn't have to wait TOO long.

By Saturday morning, her lungs were beginning to fail her.  One of them collapsed, and both of them were full of fluid.  She was completely intibated again.  This time, she was on and oscillator, a machine that holds her lungs open so that she doesn't have to breathe.   It completely shakes her whole little body.  She also started antibiotics, and surfactant treatments for her lungs.  This little girl is so sick!!  It was excruciatingly painful to see her for the first time.  How could I have complained about being so uncomfortable while pregnant, when I had to see needles and tubes sticking out from every limb of my daughter.  I would have gladly taken 4 more weeks of pain, than to have seen her for one minute like this...

Saturday night she began having problems keeping her blood pressures up.  They tried different ways of getting it up that were less invasive, but finally had to give her dopamine.  The problem with this drug is that the side effect is that it can speed up the heart rate...which we have finally gotten under control.  Luckily the meds didn't affect her, and her blood pressures were stable once again.

Romy's has a heart condition called SVT.  They don't know why she got it, but the good news is that her heart has no abnormalities.  For some reason it just triggers wrong.  The medicine she has been put on has been working great, and the cardiologists say that she will be on it for a year, maybe two.  We are just thankful that it is something that can be controlled, and that there is a high possibility that she will just grow out of it.  If not there is surgery to fix the condition.

Each day now is a waiting game.  She is healing, and we are waiting for her to heal....we are looking forward to seeing her little eyes open for the first hear her little hold her...and of take her home so that we can be a family. 

It is day 6, and I haven't seen any of my other kiddos.  It is rough, but I know I need to be here for little Romy now, and that my kids are strong and know that I love them. 

Thanks to everyone who has been praying for little Romy Lin.  She is such a trooper, and I know she will get through this...but it is through everyones prayers and hope that she is!!


Joleen said...

Oh Sweetheart! I know what you are going through!! It is hard, and every day seems like an eternity, but it will be over before you know it. Please let me know if you need anything!

Rose said...

Oh, Tamra...what a scary thing to go through. I'm so sorry your family is facing such a trial. She is so strong, she's a fighter. She'll pull through. We love and miss you guys and can't wait to see her bundled up in your arms!

Grand Pooba said...

WOW. I can't believe you've been going through all this when just a week ago you posted your cute belly picture!

I am so relieved to hear she is doing better now and I hope you can take her home soon! She is such an angel, she's just gorgeous! And what a trooper she is!

I can't imagine what it is like to watch your daughter suffer like that, I'm so sorry!

Hang in there! I'm sending good thoughts your way!

Deborah Austin said...

Tamra you are so strong!!! Wow what a story. You are amazing! Romy is a special little girl. We will continue to pray for her and that everything will be ok and she can heal as quickly as possible. If there is anything we can do let us know!!! We would be more than happy to help out with the other kids if needed or anything else that would lighten your load just let me know.

The Yearsley's said...

Wow! I got all teary eyed reading that...ya'll have been through sooo much! What a crazy week this has been! Your baby girl is soooo precious, and clearly a VERY strong little girl! I am so glad that she is doing better! We will continue to pray for ya'll and hope that ya'll can come home soon. Hang in there! And please let me know if there is anything at all that we can do!

Arin said...

When I saw your post-I became so anxious for you. My prayers go out to you and your family. I am so glad that she is doing better than at first and that the outlook is hopeful. Hang in there-you are doing a terrific job-I hope you are healing well too. Congrats on your beautiful new baby girl-I love her name.

Karine said...

Well I am all tears.... My heart goes out to you and your family! She is beautiful! She is surrounded by so much love, by you and many angels. She is so strong for all she has already gone thru! She and your names are in the temple. Our family is praying for her to become healthier and stronger every minute! HUGS AND LOVE!
The Mikesell's

Sassypants Wifey said...

Aw Hun, I am praying so hard for you guys. She is beautiful and looks strong. I am so sorry it was such a bumpy ride, that is so scary. You are in my thoughts, I couldnt help but tear up just seeing the pics. (darn pregnancy emotions dont help either, just regular birth stories get me going) Please keep us updated. Lots of strength and love your way!

Laura said...

But she is so beautiful! Thanks for putting up so many pictures. We went to see you on Sunday, but you were in the NICU. I figure you've been there as much as you could ever since.... but I'm still here if you ever need to talk, or cry, or both.


Two new nieces in two days. Rebecca Lynn and Romy Lin, I can't help but notice the similarities in their names.

Give Romy a kiss for me.

Love you so much!!!

My World said...

nice blog

Cynthi said...

I know that there is a reason for everything, even the difficult things....especially the difficult things. Even with the rough start she's had, she will pull through a fighter.
So glad you both will be fine.
We're here for ya!

Em said...

tamra!!!! this is what i get for only checking blogs once a week now! so glad they figured out how to treat romy and that she is getting such great care. are you scared? holding it together??? what is the meltdown count up to now;-) i can't even imagine the emotional stress. and through it all your hair still looks amazing. oh how i covet your curly hair.

A.Lee said...

She is so beautiful! I'm sorry you've had to go through this trying experience. Thank heavens for medicine that will help her heart. I hope she comes home soon and that you guys can hang out as a family again! You guys are still in my prayers!

Controlling My Chaos said...

My heart goes out to you. I can't imagine going through this when you have kids at home too. It's hard enough. You must be exhausted. Hang in there. I'm hoping you get to bring your little girl home soon.

Heather@WHMB said...

Godspeed! Little Romy sounds like a trooper and I wish you guys all the best as things keep getting better.

I can't imagine what that felt like from one mama to the next, watching her go through all that. God Bless you guys!